Why do couples get divorced in retirement?

Retirement is a major life transition that can affect many aspects of a person’s well-being, including their relationships. For some couples, retirement can be an opportunity to enjoy more quality time together, pursue new interests and hobbies, and strengthen their bond. For others, retirement can expose underlying issues, create new conflicts, and lead to dissatisfaction and divorce.

According to statistics, divorce rates among older adults have increased significantly in recent years. In 2021, 113,505 divorces were granted in England and Wales, a 9.6% increase on 2020, with one in four taking place after the age of 50 . In this blog post, we will explore some of the common reasons why couples get divorced in retirement, and what they can do to prevent or cope with it.

Common reasons for divorce in retirement

While every relationship is unique and complex, there are some factors that can contribute to divorce in retirement. Some of these are:

Drifting apart

Retirement can bring a lot of changes to a couple’s lifestyle, routines, roles, and expectations. Some couples may find that they have grown apart over the years, and have different goals, values, or interests. Retirement can also provide opportunities to explore new hobbies, travel, and meet new people, which can create further distance between partners.

Lack of communication

Communication is essential for any healthy relationship, but it can become more challenging in retirement. Some couples may struggle to adjust to spending more time together, or to express their needs and feelings. Others may avoid talking about sensitive issues, such as finances, health, or intimacy. Poor communication can lead to misunderstandings, resentment, and loss of connection.

Loss of identity

Retirement can affect a person’s sense of identity and purpose, especially if they derived a lot of meaning and satisfaction from their work. Some people may feel lost, bored, or depressed after retiring, and may seek a new direction or challenge in life. This can cause them to question their relationship and seek a change.

Health problems

Retirement can also bring health challenges that can affect a couple’s relationship. Some people may face physical or mental health issues that limit their activities or require more care and support from their partner. Others may experience changes in their sexual function or desire that affect their intimacy and satisfaction. Health problems can also cause stress, anxiety, or depression that can impact a person’s mood and behaviour.

Infidelity

Infidelity is another possible reason for divorce in retirement. Some people may cheat on their partner as a way of coping with boredom, loneliness, or dissatisfaction in their relationship. Others may seek excitement or validation from someone else who shares their interests or passions. Infidelity can cause a lot of pain, anger, and betrayal that can be hard to overcome.

How to prevent or cope with divorce in retirement

Divorce in retirement can have significant emotional, financial, and social consequences for both partners. It can also affect their children,
grandchildren, friends, and relatives. Therefore, it is important to try
to prevent or cope with divorce in retirement as best as possible. Some of the ways to do this are:

Seek counselling

Counselling can be very helpful for couples who are facing difficulties in their relationship or considering divorce in retirement. A counsellor can help them improve their communication skills, resolve conflicts, understand each other’s perspectives, and rebuild trust and intimacy. Counselling can also help them decide whether to stay together or separate amicably.

Plan ahead

Planning ahead for retirement can also help couples avoid or reduce some of the stressors that can lead to divorce in retirement. Couples should discuss their expectations, goals, finances, and lifestyle preferences before they retire,
and make sure they are on the same page. They should also plan for how they will spend their time, balance their individual and shared activities, and maintain their social network.

Protect your assets

Divorce in retirement can have a significant impact on your financial situation,
especially if you have to split your pension, retirement income, or property with your ex-partner. You should consult a financial adviser and a lawyer to understand your rights and options and protect your assets as much as possible.
You should also review your will and beneficiary designations to make sure they reflect your current wishes.

Take care of yourself

Divorce in retirement can be emotionally draining and stressful, so it is important to take care of yourself during this time. You should try to maintain a healthy lifestyle by eating well, exercising regularly, and getting enough sleep. You should also seek support from your family, friends, or other sources such as support groups or online communities. You should also pursue your interests and hobbies and find ways to enjoy life and stay positive.

Great joint activities for retired couples

Do you want to spice up your life with some fun and exciting adventures?
Here are some of the best ways to enjoy your golden years with your partner. Whether you’re into nature, culture, sports, or hobbies, there’s something for everyone here. Let’s get started!

One of the most popular joint activities for retired couples is traveling. Traveling is a great way to explore new places, learn new things, and meet new people. You can choose to travel locally, nationally, or internationally, depending on your budget and preferences. You can also join a tour group or plan your own itinerary. Traveling can enrich your mind, body, and soul, and create lasting memories with your partner.

Another great joint activity for retired couples is volunteering. Volunteering is a wonderful way to give back to your community, make a difference in the world, and connect with like-minded people. You can volunteer for a cause that you’re passionate about, such as animal welfare, environmental protection, education, health care, or social justice. Volunteering can also help you develop new skills, boost your self-esteem, and improve your well-being.

A third great joint activity for retired couples is taking classes. Taking classes is a fun and stimulating way to learn something new, challenge yourself, and expand your horizons. You can take classes in anything that interests you, such as languages, arts, crafts, music, dance, cooking, or gardening. You can also take classes online or in person, depending on your convenience and comfort level. Taking classes can also help you meet new friends who share your passions.

These are just some of the great joint activities for retired couples that you can try. Of course, there are many more options out there that you can discover and enjoy. The most important thing is to find something that suits your personality, lifestyle, and goals.